Shi* show to sparkles

“When life gives you lemons, just add vodka and have a party.” - Party Patty.

Introduction:

If you are the "lucky schmuck" at your company, the "I really didn't want this job but here I am" person or the one that planned his entire life for the role you are in, congratulations because you've arrived. And to think all of this whether you wanted it or not. I was somewhere in the middle of those classifications, when it hit me that almost every day was starting as a steaming pile of shi*, that I somehow could not avoid, in the field of surgery, as a nurse, and the only choice I had, was to figure out how to make it rain sparkles. So, I want to talk about that here with all of you, so we can make it rain sparkles together while learning to navigate some of life's crappiest moments.

With that said, here are 5 ways you can navigate out of negative momentum and into the power of positivity 👊

1. Put your foot down; like in quick-sand kind of down

It was about 9:30 AM on a Monday at my old workplace. The surgeons had started rolling in for their on-going cases for the day and one in particular, came out of the OR after his first case on a scathing tirade. He was firing at anyone in his path because "nobody had asked him what he wanted from the sushi restaurant for lunch and with all the cases he brings, this is completely unacceptable"! He ended that tantrum with the instructions that this should be a "life-long" order and not to forget it. There I was. Standing in the center of a shi* pile on a Monday. So, quickly thinking, I took control of the situation and told him: a) his beloved sushi spot doesn't open until 11 and b) nobody is allowed to speak to not only me this way, but my staff either. And yes, those are my staff. My TEAM. So, let's make this expectation clear right then, in the moment. The key is to handle disrespect in the workplace, as soon as it happens, professionally and respectfully.

2. Keep it in perspective

This is your job, not your life. You are at work many hours per week, likely, and chances are it gets intense no doubt. But you don't want to lose your cool because something someone said upset or offended you, or because you just simply disagree. The way I look at these situations is to take a deep breath in the moment, even shutting yourself in a room if necessary and ask yourself "why was that so offensive" or "what did I dislike so much about what just happened?" In that moment, you can get to the root of the issue and self-reflect before you formulate a THOUGHTFUL response. This doesn't mean you're just going to play nice in the sandbox even if you were wronged, but you ARE going to remain professional and consider both sides of the equation, to assist in coming to a sound resolution. If your reaction to a personal slight is immediate, this almost never goes well. You often come out the hero when you exhibit emotional intelligence and offer suggestions vs. complaints.

3. Become the calming current 🌊

When things are amiss and your reaction is consistent in that you first ask questions, make no assumptions and interview everyone involved, those around you begin to see something about that sparkling character of yours. This is because a lot of times, people are very quick to jump to conclusions and when people in positions of authority do this, the message being sent is that you are judgmental, dis-attached and politically motivated by the corporate world. So, when the dumpster catches fire in the parking lot and everyone is running in circles, you're the one calmly grabbing the fire extinguisher and walking, not running to put it out.

4. STOP the negative self-talk

The next time your brain starts saying you can't do something; I want you to stand up and do ten jumping jacks. I say this because clearly you need to get that serotonin level up and you need some vitamin D. Yes, spoken like a true nurse, I know. But the truth about this concept is that your brain will say these things to you (that are lies by the way), based on the fear of the unknown. "There is no way this is going to work, because there is a LOT of hard work ahead and you’d have to get really lucky for that to stick!" NOT TRUE. And as I sit here typing these words, I want you to know, my former colleagues are witness to the days of my standing up and doing 13 squats an hour or using my exercise bands in my office.  Before you ask, I did 13 because that’s my mom’s lucky number and the exercise was for my mental health. This was especially important on the extra hard days. You would not believe how much better you feel and more clearly you can think with some good blood flow and fresh air. You can come back and look at what might be an unfavorable situation in a much different light.

5. Eat a doughnut 🍩

That was not a typo. Let me tell you about the power of a doughnut: where I was working for a very long time, because we were a medical facility, there seemed to be a lot of small fires burning at once. This was often, so I won't sugar-coat it and pretend it didn't happen. But it was on those mornings, you could see it on the faces of the entire team, and they would dig deep and power through. I found the small gesture of adding doughnuts into the mix on those days, went a long way. It wasn't just about "feeling bad" for the staff. It was my way of saying "I see this full-fledged circus tent on fire, and I am in here with you, trying to keep it from burning down." Sharing in a doughnut really helped to level-set the playing field when it felt like all a person wanted to do was run for the hills. It allowed us to make jokes, find a silver lining and sometimes even bond over how we probably should not be eating a doughnut. But life is short and at the end of the day I realized those little moments matter most when you are trying to keep a ship afloat while keeping its crew intact.

For the end of the blog today, I leave you with the following video. Let me just say there is a reason it has over 24 million views. I used this often at my desk to bring myself back to center, and for re-focusing. If you want to get into some real juicy stuff on the blog, come back next week!